Going Out on Top

I attended a great funeral yesterday.

Okay, I know how that sounds. But it really was a wonderful event.

Ron Vannelli was a helluva guy. I didn't know him all that well but I liked him a lot. I went to school with his son Greg and know most of his other kids as well. He was a hockey guy through and through, a proud dad of several good players and a terrific referee in his day.

More importantly, he was a good guy away from the game, too. He liked people and liked being with people. He was a guy who was always the life of the party ... even when there was no party.

Ron had been pretty sick in recent years with a rare disease I wouldn't even try to pronounce. It kept him in a wheelchair but, by all reports, he never lost his indomitable spirit (a trait he handed down to his kids and grandkids).

When a man like that leaves us, he deserves a good farewell.

And he got it yesterday. It was SRO at St. Andrew's tiny church yesterday. The priest gave a solid, solemn performance. The songs were basically traditional stuff at funeral. But the pianists and singer were in good form, grabbing your attention without blowing your head off.

Two of his sons coach a local high school hockey team. We exited as their players held their sticks high. Very interesting and nifty stuff.

The real stars of the day, however, were the orators - his son Mark, his nephew Roger and one of the 28 grandkids, Robbie. There were some stories told that clearly meant something only to the family members and tales that everybody could acknowledge. But all of them were told with love and smiles and lots of talk about how much Ron lved his family. On one of the coldest days we have known around here in years, St. Andrew's was a very warm place.

Afterwards, we all repaired to a local saloon/eatery for a terrific brunch filled with laughter and more storytelling.

A friend of mine who was sitting next to me in church noted that, as we get older, we are now attending more of these sort of events than ever. "I went to four in 10 days at one point last year," he said.

True enough.

But it seems to me the whole idea of a wake and (if there is one) a funeral is to honor and represent the life of the deceased. As tough as it is to say goodbye to a friend of a family member, it is easier to do so with a smile and a fond memory.

Now, whenever Ron's name comes up in conversation, I know I will instantly feel happy inside.

I went home and told my wife this is how I want to check out -- with people smiling, telling tales about or on me, having a good meal and, if they want one, a drink or two.

I am sure there were a few tears somewhere yesterday and I don't mean to make light of those who do so. But I would like to think most folks went home last night and couldn't wait to tell someone what a wonderful experience it was.

I can't think of a better tribute to somebody.